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Great Lakes Brewing Company, Cleveland, OH
Nosferatu

Nosferatu is Great Lakes’ stock ale, and also the name of a 1920’s silent-era movie based on Bram Stoker’s Dracula. So, yeah, Great Lakes is shooting for a vampire-themed scariness. The 8.0% ABV is pretty startling, and the deep red-amber color is certainly striking, but hardly scary. The aroma is somewhat fruity and inviting. The beer itself is very highly hopped, and has a full mouth-feel. As the beer gets older (remember to check the “best by” date, folks!), a bitterness really comes out that is quite vicious, but for a newer bottle, the bitterness and astringency is comparable to Dogfishhead’s 60 Minute IPA: tolerable, but it really makes you sit up and take notice. The aftertaste does not diminish into a vile bitterness, but the caramel-like flavor does have a bitter side that makes sure one cannot let this beer get too warm, and will keep the average beer drinker far, far away. I can honestly say there’s really nothing scary about what’s in the bottle, however, the blood-sucker metaphor is aptly applied because of the price: $10 for a four-pack. I guess even good beers have a scary side.

M!dd13m4n’s rating – 3.5 Pint

Tags: Beer Review by Midd13m4n
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Happy Halloween Everyone!!!

Hopefully you will get lots of candy and goodies tonight. Please check out this article from cockeyed.com about The Candy Code. It is sort of a quasi-sudo Hobo Code for Trick-or-Treating. I really wish I had known about this when I was a kid. I highly recommend that kids start letting each other know about this developing code.

Please let us know about you spent your Halloween. Did you pass out candy or did you go Trick-or-Treating yourself. What was your costume this year? We want to hear from you.

Tags: Rant by DaVe
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Wheel of Fortune has been on for as long as I can remember. Pat Sajak and Vanna White have been entertaining millions of viewers everyday of the week since 1983. It is the classic game of hangman put to cheesy music and random dollar values. Wheel of Fortune is Vegas and grade school spelling rolled into one.

There are multiple reasons that I will most likely never be on Wheel of Fortune. Here are a few of them: I’m not a very good speller, I swear alot (and that doesn’t make for good family fun) and I have a face for the internet, not syndicated family programming. Vanna’s long standing restraining order against me doesn’t help matters any (although, I think the wheel is far enough away from the letter board).

If I ever do get on Wheel of Fortune, there are a few things I would love to try. First off, I would tell the producers a long drawn out made-up story about my pass that would be more shocking and disturbing. Lite and anecdotal is not my style. “My card says you are into chemistry experiments and entrepreneurship. Tell is more about that.” “Well Pat, I enjoy making Crystal Meth, PCP and Smack in my basement and I sell it to high schoolers. I employ the homeless to sell rocks to construction workers. I also collect scabs in my spare time.” The more absurd, disturbing and fantastical the story, the better.

Secondly, I would make naughty and absurd guesses at the puzzle. If I was in a situation where I could make a guess and wasn’t going to win big money, I would guess things that the censors would cringe at. You can avoid the naughty words and still make people very uncomfortable. “Pat, I would like to solve the puzzle. ‘Grandma’s Sloppy Sausage Hole’?” I think Pat would turn ghost white.

Another thing I would take to doing on the show is alot of hugging. I mean ALOT!!! I’m going to hug you when I win. I would be giving out full-body hugs to people for beating me in rounds. These hugs would be a step away from dry-humping someone on camera. I’d be just a lovable person. Pat’s getting a hug. Vanna’s getting a hug. The other two contestants are getting hugs. The crew… Audience members…

Finally, I would select my letters in a sequences that is inappropriate for network television. “Pat, can I have an ‘F’? I’d like to buy a ‘U’. Are there any ‘C’s on the board?” I doubt anyone would catch on to this, but I’d have fun anyways.

I’m not sure Wheel of Fortune is the game-show for me, but I would sure be a memorable guest for Pat and Vanna.

Tags: Rant by DaVe
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Redhook Ale Brewery, Woodinville, WA and Portsmouth, NH
ESB Original Ale

As legend has it, the ESB was the first beer brewed by Redhook. And up until about two years ago when their marketing folks renamed their flatly selling IPA to “Longhammer”, the ESB was their number one seller. Well, they certainly knew what they were doing when they brewed this beer, and they apparently didn’t screw with a good thing, either. With a beautiful amber color, this is certainly one hell of a beer. It is just bitter enough to let you know that this is something special. Likewise, it is just hoppy enough to give you a zesty hint of spice (Would those be the Saaz Hops I taste? Or are those the Kent Goldings? I believe so.*) And as for the aftertaste, there some hints of lightly roasted barly malt, and some delicate floral notes, with that slight bitterness carried through to the finish. Yes, this was their flagship beer until… Well, that’s okay: let all those other beer-snob wannabes drink the Longhammer IPA, and that will leave more ESB for me.

M!dd13m4n’s rating – 4.5 Pints

Note: No, I am not a hop-snob, either. The only reason I know that they use Saaz and Kent Golding hops in their ESB (and IPA, too) is because on the brewery tour in Portsmouth, NH, not only do they give you samples of the beer, but they also give you pellet-sized samples of the actual hops that they use. They use six different kinds of hops for their beers, and each one has a different character. There’s a hell of a lot you can learn by tasting the hops and then tasting the beer – it all comes together nicely.

Tags: Beer Review by Midd13m4n
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New Holland Brewing Company, Holland, MI
Ichabod Pumpkin Ale

Another day, another specialty brew. This one is another of the broad group of ales brewed with pumpkins and spices as a celebration of the autumn season and the cool weather that it brings. Typically speaking, I am not a fan of any beer that requires an adjunct (like pumpkin and spices) or gimmicks (like naming the beer after a fictional, pumpkin-wielding ghost story). That said, this beer is actually quite good and drinkable – it is as close to a pumpkin pie in a bottle. The deep brown color of the beer is inviting, and it has a subtle, spicy nose that is a nice blend of nutmeg and hops. The first taste is that of a very full-bodied ale: not too hoppy, with a very mellow roasted flavor throughout. Give the beer a second to bloom in your mouth, and the rich pumpkin-pie like flavor begins to blossom. The roasted flavor is constant, but is punctuated by an even sweetness from the pumpkin and a perfect level of spiciness from nutmeg. Make the mistake of letting this beer get warm, and you will not be punished with a bitter, fouled concoction. On the contrary, when warm (translate as not fresh out of the fridge, drawing close to room temperature), the beer seems to miraculously rebalance itself, sending the pumpkin and nutmeg forward to hide the bitterness. Few fruit beers have such perfect balance in flavors; usually one flavor takes over and crowds out the others leaving behind an unhappy customer. Not this beer. This beer really does lend itself to celebrating the cool weather and falling leaves, inspiring you to tilt back a few bottles (or pints) with friends, and then slipping off to your own Sleepy Hollow.

M!dd13m4n’s rating – 3.5 Pint

Tags: Beer Review by Midd13m4n
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Avery Brewing Company, Boulder, CO
The Kaiser Imperial Oktoberfest Lager

This is a very big beer in a very big bottle. This is one of those beers that comes in a 22 oz. bottle, not because they want to give you more beer, but because its 10.03% ABV just would not fit in the normal 12 oz. bottle. On top of that, the robust flavor really knocks you down a couple more pegs. The color is a beautiful slightly reddish amber, and it has a wonderfully fruity aroma. My first impression was a strange, almost astringent, bitterness right on the tip of my lips and the tip of my tongue. Then that was followed by a major malt wallop that knocks you front on with full force. A healthy yeast flavor is there, too, with minimal hoppiness. The flavor is nicely complex, particularly if it is chilled just right – yeah, just like most high-ABV, malty beers, once this one gets warm, it gets REALLY bitter-nasty. Typically, I do drink two bottles when doing these reviews: the first is to get the impression of the beer, and the second is while I’m writing up the review. I couldn’t do that with this beer – two bottles would have killed me. And really, I wasn’t all that impressed, so a second bottle wouldn’t have happened even if was a regular 12 oz. size.

M!dd13m4n’s rating – 3 Pints

Tags: Beer Review by Midd13m4n
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